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Icon: LJ/sixthmile
Layout: tuesdaynight
Inspiration: DayBefore!Misery
i understand now..
Written on: Friday, April 17, 2009
Time: 3:51 PM

That same person, Ivy, whom I asked about the question beside others, today, at school, after hearing her words, I started to understand better. Its quite a long post because we had been talking about it for almost an hour? I think it should be less than that.

She said this:
You think just becoming a christian and doing good things, you will immediately go to heaven? No such thing, if that happens, then everyone will do the same thing. Then everything will be perfect. Then Heaven will be so crowded. Once you die, you are dead already. Why must still care which one to go even after your death? You can't feel any pain after you already die.

Jiayi once told me about the rules of Hell in her buddhist side. Like the torturous methods, and even the 18 levels of Hell. I don't believe in it because how could those people who first made that rule of Hell, find out about it? HOW did they find out? We don't know at all! Who knows they might be making up stories so that it will scare you and make you do good things for your own good?

If you don't believe in God, you will go to hell? Where got such thing? Then that means if I don't wear this shirt because I don't want to, I go to hell arh? I don't even think there must be hell and heaven. But if you go to hell, go to hell lah. If you go to heaven, go to heaven lah. Its destiny. How to change when you die? Same goes for me too cos everyone will die in the end mah.

The purpose of going to church is to learn more about God, not to force yourself to believe him just so that you can go to heaven.

If you think God can do everything for you, then we might as well don't need to study. Just pray to God for good results, thats all. I once did that when I was young, I keep praying, never study. Then exams came, I keep failing.. Thats why its best to believe in yourself and not God because if you don't, even God can't help you. Thats why when you can believe in yourself, you start to believe in God in same way.

God is more of a miracle. There's one time my family, my relatives and I could not find a taxi from an airport (I don't know which country; here or m'sia) and it was very late, like around 2am plus. No taxi sign at all. We took really long to find one. Then we all crowded to pray together. Then about a few seconds later, many taxi came! Its quite a big number. When we all took one and left that place, I could still see more taxi going in, like never end. And there's not alot of people because its so late. Amazing right?! Because its a miracle!

As for that friend of Steven, who knows that friend actually BLUFFED him? You should know that Steven is really stupid. Alot of people like to fool him, you know. He always everytime believe this and that. He even believe in black magic =.= (Ivy used to complain alot of incidences whereby steven was always fooled and always doing dumb things etc LOL)

So don't worry so much! Just study, be happy, and live our life is good enough!


This is exactly what my mother said to me. Especially the part where she and ivy said the same thing "Believe in yourself, because if you don't, even God can't help you"

My mother also said "Its guideline is to help change you into a better person, thats all"
Anyway after that discussion, Ivy asked me the last time "So do you want to believe in God?"

I said "Yes. After your explanation, I finally understood. Nevertheless, I will still believe in Him."

But most importantly, I should believe in myself first.

She even said I cried for nothing =.= I do admit being silly but who doesn't care for their loved ones?! Anyway, thanks Ivy!! :D

And Jinwen, its okay for the "spamming". I also understood your point. After seeing your comment, I suddenly feel inspired to cherish even more to those around me. And I want to make my parents even happier than before, that is to pass my O levels, work hard and provide them so they can retire happily and have good life under my care. Thanks for ur tag! :D

And Hau En, thanks! Its my choice. I will still continue to believe in God because I hope with the help of it, I can become a better person. So see you tomorrow at Pioneer! :D